Saturday, May 28, 2005

Dear God, Part 1

Let me preface this whole post by saying ...

I grew up like most of us - we occasionally yelled at each other in my house. When we got mad, we said everything we were feeling, and we did it so that no one in town had to guess if we were upset. That was pretty common.

Fast forward to now. Through all of our adoption and foster care training we have reevaluated this thing we call "yelling."  We would like to cut it out of our days as much as possible. So, I have to work really hard to overcome my desire to get REALLY loud when I'm upset. In our house, it's not okay to yell. If someone raises their voice, ANYONE can politely correct them, and remind them to "change their voice," "please don't yell" or my daughter's favorite: "Let go of your anger!" My kids have to say these things to me as much as I do to them. We work hard to speak kindly, and the hard work is required because we tend to always find ourselves scootching right back into "loud" voice!

Having said all of that (so you won't take this the way it TOTALLY appears!)...

Last week in Sunday School, my daughter's class made a Family Prayer Journal. There is a page for each family member. I'm just going to copy straight from my page, and let you imagine the faces the Sunday School teachers must have been making:

"Dear God,

Help my Mom to have great days and to not yell. Help her to tell people about Jesus to."


tonia/sparrow said...

When I had only one child, I was the sweetest, most patient mother. Now I have four, and three of them are boys. I'm not that sweet,patient mother anymore...sigh, but I want to be! I'm praying for help with this right now too. Thanks for your honesty!

Jenn said...

I dunno....she might have been thinking, "Gee, I'm glad I'm not the only one..."


Julie said...

omgosh, that is so cute! I can't help but giggle at her honesty!

I am a reformed yeller. I've been yell free for just 2 weeks now, but it's been the best 2 weeks of my life. I have felt my temper welling up inside of me, but i have been finding ways to get out what i need to say without yelling. i know i must sound horrible, since i have 3 small kids and am just now improving this area, but as you were, i was raised with alot of yelling. and I'm now starting to see how my daughter is handling that yelling, she isn't very nice and i realized it was ME! It's hard though, the kids can be awfully loud when playing, then turn to hurting eachother, and i have no choice but to yell above them yelling to get anyone's attention! Sheesh! LOL

Stacey said...

Hi Christine - I just realized you have my blog on your favorites list and you send a lot of people my way! Thank you so much! As soon as I get around to actually putting up all the blogs I read, yours will be up there too!

Thanks again!

sster said...

In my house growing up, a nasty tone of voice could be considered 'yelling.' I think it's important to keep this in mind, too. Sometimes we can be quiet but nasty. BUT, I think that if you're used to yelling, taking your voice down is a great way to reorient your attitude toward the conversation. I hope I don't yell when the kiddos come! I know I will feel the urge, so I'll keep reading for good advice.