Wednesday, August 23, 2006

love hurts


Today we said good-bye to our sweet foster son. He has been with us for eight and a half months. He's four years old, he's gorgeous/adorable and even though we'll see him this weekend, he just spent his last night in our home.

This is very different from saying good-bye to the babies we have fostered. This one talks back! He can verbally express his grief and pain ... and love.

It's also really confusing when you are totally prepared and ready for this to happen, so in that sense you are looking forward to the change - the refocusing of your family unit. So, we're all a big pile of happy and sad.

The kids are outside running off some energy and emotions. I'm inside wearing teeth whitening strips and blogging (after having three cups of coffee). We all handle it in our own ways.

We sure are going to miss that little guy. He has come a long way, and is being adopted by the most God-picked perfect family you can imagine. They are an ideal match for each other. We're thrilled for him ... and them!

I had a quiet moment with him this morning. We hugged and I teared up as I stared at his tiny fingers and that funny little pouty mouth he makes. He just kept hugging me over and over and over again before climbing into his big new world and buckling in for the trip. I wouldn't trade this for anything. Our family can handle some pain. What these children go through ... well, what we have to deal with can't even compare. We will happily hurt each time they leave us, because we were used ... if only for a moment ... to touch their lives forever.

Good-bye Little A.

9 comments:

Mary Beth said...

Oh, you made me teary.

I'm so glad that he got to spend nine months with the perfect family, and that he gets to spend the rest of his life with his next perfect family.

You are a good, brave family.

Tara said...

*wiping a tear away*

thanks for sharing your stories about fostering and adoption. it truly is an inspiration!

Anonymous said...

Man Christine, I admire you for your strength. If I were in your position, I don't know what I would have done. I am going to miss Little A a lot too. I am glad to hear you say that the family is "the most God-picked perfect family you can imagine." It is good to know that. How are the other kiddos taking it? How is Michael taking it?

Jorden

Becky said...

Aww dang it woman, you made me cry.

chelle said...

wow. You are amazing. How wonderful for your family to experience the gift of family with another little person :) hugs I hope your teeth get really white :)

Christine said...

Jorden,

We're all doing really well. When you consider that this is the fifth placement we've had ... the way we feel doesn't surprise us or catch us off guard. It really does get easier, not because you don't get attached, but because you really are happy for them and you know you'll stay in touch. We've become really good friends with his family over the last several weeks - emailing, calling, etc. We'll always get to be a part of his life.

The hardest part is getting used to just having three kids again. Last night I kept thinking I had forgotten to pick up Little A from his class! ha! ha! I have a small panic attack about every hour, afraid that I'm missing a kid! :)

Rose said...

You always inspire me. And you are one brave and unselfish women. What a joy to keep up with your life through your blog.

Leann said...

((((((ONEGINORMOUSHUG)))))) I am so sorry...

Katherine M. Curlee said...

Ok, I'm totally crying here!! I hate good-byes!! I can't even begin to imagine what you must feel and would have the hardest time being a foster parent. I know God has extra crowns waiting for you for your ministry to these precious little lambs in heaven. YOU GO GIRL!!! Love you bunches!!!