I will be doing many adoption posts before the month closes, but I want to start with the women with whom adoption starts - first mothers. They are the first mothers to our children. They are the first to love them. They are so very strong and so very selfless, and they are also the ones who carry the greatest amount of grief.
I, in no way, am saying that first fathers are not important. They are equally vital to our adopted children. They also grieve heavily. Yet, today, I wanted to focus on first mothers.
Our children spend their first nine months with their first mothers. While growing inside their first mother, they are comforted by their movements, soothed by their voice, and nourished by their bodies. When they enter their adoptive homes, they grieve their first mothers. They miss them. They carry them along for a lifetime, with every pulse of their heart, and the physical traits they inherit.
Their first mother may or may not nurse them, but will ultimately find themselves facing swollen breasts, aching for a child that they will no longer nourish. Their pains of recovery are reminders of their grief. Their empty arms ache. Their hearts are broken.
Today I honor first mothers by acknowledging their beauty, their love and their pain. I dedicate today's post to J and R, the first mothers to three of my children. I am proud to call you family, and although watching your children grow cannot take away your pain, you deserve the comfort that it brings. Our children deserve the answers that they need, and beyond that, we are all amazingly blessed to have you in our lives. You are a gift.
Forever in My Heart
What I Wish My Child's Adoptive Mother Knew