Thursday, March 05, 2009

My husband almost kissed another woman

Our therapist helped us balance the struggles of one of our kids with our family vacation. We found a great day camp in the area where one child can go and enjoy field trips and have a break from the massive desire to sabotage with the rest of the family. It gives everyone else a little break, too. But everyone gets to do fun stuff. It's not a therapeutic respite program (tailored to reactive attachment disorder), but our therapist suggested we go ahead and utilize this type of option (seeing how we could find absolutely nothing else). We knew this would mean lots of fun times, and attempts at triangulation, but we were instructed to just downplay it each afternoon.

We went to our former church last night, which we KNEW would be stressful for some of our kids. Imagine:  tons and tons and tons of people walking up to Mom and Dad, hugging them, saying how much we all miss one another. It was a natural part of what old friends do. However, it was a massive challenge for our hurting and healing kids

There was a dramatic crying fit. There was a moment in the choir room where we surprised everyone, and our child attempted to push past us and start taking bows in front of the whole room when everyone erupted with the excitement of seeing us. There was a constant state of trying to get the attention of anyone who might pass by. It was quite exhausting. For all of us.

There were no "I love you's" at bedtime. Instead, we received some warm and cozy, "I like everyone except YOU TWO!"

All to be expected.

Then, it happened. I know my marriage is not immune from it, by I just wasn't sure WHEN my husband might succumb to temptation.

He took our child to the day camp program this morning. The director let him know (in front of our child) they were dominating the teacher's time so much the day before they had to come to the office to receive extra help. My husband explained to the director how we purposefully sent them with only review work so absolutely nothing would be new or challenging for them. It was glorified busy work. Only to fill the space when the other kids were having worksheet and reading time.To which the director turned to our child and said ...

"Ohhhhhh. I'm sure you get bored at times because you are the oldest this week. You can come to the office and be a helper - AFTER you have completed everything your Mom and Dad have sent with you."

My husband's mouth began to water. He wanted to so badly - to just kiss her right on the mouth.  Sweet validation in the thick of things.

"Ms. S, this is a battle we fight at home quite often. It seems it has been working for them here." Then to our child, "I think what you are seeing is how your teachers and Ms. S. are all on the same team - the same team as your Mom and I. To help you keep moving forward!"

The Director: "And we like honesty here at out school."

And ushered them on to class.

I am happy Michael did not follow through on this three-second affair. I am proud he could feel the temptation, yet stay faithful.

Honestly, I would have grabbed that chic by the ears and smooched her long and hard.

(photo by Julia Freeman-Woolpert)


a Tonggu Momma said...

Wonderful, wonderful news!

Torina said...

Don't you just love it when people don't immediately dismiss you? And they back you up in front of your kids? Priceless. After you are done with the teach, I will smack her a big one, too!

Hannah_Rae said...

Hooray for more victories!!! :)

One summer we had a good friend living with us. I was laying on the futon in our basement when Kaleb went upstairs. I heard footsteps and assumed it was Kaleb. My eyes were closed, but I felt someone close to my face so I went in for the kiss. SHE SCREAMED!!! I almost kissed her! Whoops! She never lets me forget it. :)

Lisa said...

Wowee!!! I am in LOVE with her!!!!
I don't think I could've restrained myself!

Ericka said...

Amen for confirmations and affirmations!!!!!!

Brenda said...

WOW! Nobody catches on that quick! You have made quite a find! : ) I'm glad he restrained himself. That might have done some weird things for Mar! ; )

Sara said...


truevyne said...

Would you please ask your husband to go kiss...I mean talk to the teachers at my son's new school? He's all, "I forgot all about that. I lost hat paper. May I please have another?" as he beats his beautiful long eyelashes at the teachers, and I'm all like, "Did you give him a zero when he didn't turn it in?" I'm finding crumpled up empty worksheets all over his room and in the van. Sigh...