Corey once posted on how well unschooling can compliment children with a history of trauma (and I could not find the specific post, Corey - sorry!). Children learn ... like, all the time. Many of you have asked about the challenges of educating a child who is doing everything they can to push you away. Here are my thoughts.First - stop worrying about it! Really. You will not be able to gauge where a child is academically if they do not want you to. So, sneak in the back door.
One of our children sits with us every day during school right now. They can participate in everything we do. If they start to disrupt or try to engage in a battle, I usually just say, "That's cool. If you want to take a break from school, go ahead. Would you like to get a book and just hang out for awhile?"
And that's that.
They are kids. They absorb so much. I will offer to help if they are struggling (even if I know it is more of an emotional struggle). I avoid doing things that promote too much competition, as that can be a trigger. We do not keep grades. It's all about experiencing and learning together. No need for a battle. If it's too much, then they can take a break.
Unschooling, my friends. Our kids are sponges.
Because of the many special needs in our home, my children thrive most with structure. So, we will always have organized schoolwork (and bedtimes and excursions, etc.). One of my children once chose to sit out for an entire week of school. The next week I was reading a book to everyone and mispronounced one of the names. This child playfully corrected me. They heard everything we did. They absorbed it all.
I am not worried about their education. I am worried about their attachment and trust and ability to love without fear.
(photo by ivan petrov)
6 comments:
Dealing with this RIGHT NOW. Daddy is on a trip therefore RADishes are disregulated therefore it is IMPOSSIBLE to sounds out the word 'am' or spell the word 'farm.' Gotta love it.
For John I've found that if he gets some 'much needed' rest on his bed when he's 'too tired' to remember how to do what he's supposed to...he suddenly remembers- like magic, right? (:
We talked about how his brain can't work right when his heart is sad but he refuses to talk about it. The sadness shuts off the part of his brain that knows how to sound out words. After the talk- he's been able to sound out all his words!
Maybe some day he'll be able to walk thru these things on his own- for today, not so much.
My first grader did her math paper on subtraction perfect, got all 30 problems correct and the next week got most all of the problems wrong. On the paper that she did all correct she wrote her name on the back. I sing that Frank Sinatra song 'My Way' in my head at these times. Gotta love that spunk!
It's ok, I toss things out there all the time and never, ever put them in a labeled post!
I have a good story to tell about schooling, but it will have to wait till I get back from PA.
xoxo
PS. Good=making me so crazy I would like to pull every hair on my body out one at a time.
Say this and thought about your family
I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst. Then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
Marilyn Monroe
I meant saw this and thought about your family LOL
Oh boy! That sounds like my Dandy! :)He's not quite seven now and keeps his smarts under wraps the same way. I had him home yesterday going over "any number + 1 is the next number." in every way I could possibly demonstrate it until I thought blood was going to shoot out of my eyes.
Some days he can't sound out "the" and others he'll read a book in proper time with different voices for each character. I tell people that same thing. He's ALWAYS soaking it in even when it doesn't seem like he'll ever move forward.
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