Sunday, February 07, 2010

More of the therapeutic parenting vlogging









29 comments:

Hannah_Rae said...

WHOOHOO!!!

I literally shouted "YAY! A NEW VIDEO!!!!"

And just a few moments ago, our eldest was really stuck in dumb-ville.

Ah, divine providence.

Christine said...

Tell him I could smell him "playing dumb" all the way from Texas, and felt inspired. :)

Lynn said...

I too was thrilled to see another video. These are the best!!!!

We use the word "cow" in our house. Keeps the kids on their toes. We've also used pickle and purple. It's loads of fun being silly even with healthy attached children. I've got a couple of those that can chatter your ears off!!!!!!

Jess said...

good stuff. i love that you encourage formation of your kids vs. achievement (which can be deceiving). good stuff...thanks :)

Diana said...

Yeah! I love your videos! Thanks for sharing them with all of us! You are seriously one of my heros!

waldenbunch said...

I'm asking you again, can you come live with us? Seriously, you never cease to amaze me, but I have realized that I do a lot of the "pizazz" with my kids and as long as I keep it unthreatening it suits the purpose. It just requires constant change and brain power. It is like being back in theatre where you have to think on your feet and be in the moment.Except I'm 25 years older! Keep it up, Christine! I wish I could go to FL with you girls!

denie heppner said...

did you label this "vlogging" on purpose or is that typo? hilarious. good videos, keep'em coming.

Kerrie said...

I jacked the volume up ALL THE WAY, so hyper-vigilant Princess would be sure to "over-hear" it. Heh heh heh. And I know she heard it because she started pretending to have fun. HAH!!

Christine said...

Denie, "vlogging" is video blogging.

Now, doesn't that make me sound so savvy and "in the know."

heh. heh.

Heather said...

Thank you so much for doing these - it really helps to hear the examples you give. I sat and watched them AGAIN last night again. It is like free therapy! And reminds me why I am doing this. Wish I were coming to FL with you guys. Have a margarita in my honor wouldja?

marythemom said...

In our house the word is frog. I've been using it since my bio dd was little to see if she was listening, or if she asked what we were having for dinner during breakfast (and I had no idea of course), we often had frog liver with rum raisin sauce.

While we don't get the nonsense questions or chatter, my adopted dd likes to dissociate and distract with nonsense comments or questions when we're discussing something she doesn't want to or can't deal with, and one of the first times we noticed this she was talking about liking chicken wings. So that has become our code word for dissociation/ distraction, especially in therapy. Sometimes I'll just say "Chicken wing" and she knows that I know she is deliberately changing the subject.

One of my favorite lines in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (the new version with Johnny Depp that I don't particularly care for) is when everyone is talking about something to do with the factory and it's Grandma Georgina's turn to talk and she says, "I like grapes." (Yes, I know this has nothing to do with anything, but it makes me laugh!).

Mary in TX
"I like grapes."

Wendy said...

Yeah!! Can you think of ways to stop the nonsense questions and chatter in a small (just turned 4) child? I have tried some of these but he doesn't get it. I will ask the question back and he still keeps asking. And I don't mean a few times, I mean 30, 40 times. I am sure you understand!

Givans Family said...

You KNEW I needed this! Oh how I love Christine, lol! Sooooo unbelievably sad that I can't go to FL too....sigh....UNLESS I can find a way to leave my breasts behind....pity, I am slightly attached to them.....anyway, I hope you have a BLAST! You totally deserve it. Thank you so much for alwasy encouraging your readers, including me....

Christine said...

Wendy, you may have to balance this one. It's right around ages 4-6 when kids do naturally ask a lot of (insane and could-you-please-just-kill-me) questions.

I realize that makes you want to just flip me off. :)

Jessi Hacker said...

I am loving the videos! Definitely good to get reminders of how I need to be doing things. I am struggling something awful right now with my kiddo and lying. I don't ask her if she does things. She has started continually coming up to me lying. As in standing in front of me tearing up the broom and saying "Mom everytime I touch the broom this stuff falls off" or coming in and announcing she does not have homework, when we know she does everyday. I am ignoring her for now, but am not sure that is the right thing to do.

Christine said...

Jessi,

Feeling snarky? Maybe it's time to take that broom, and carry it around for awhile ... hugging and loving on it (poor thing!). Maybe even give it a place at dinner. Poor, poor broom.

When they run in and tell you a lie on PURPOSE, that's when you start keeping a piece of paper and a pencil in your back pocket. You say, "Hold on, just a sec." Pull out the paper and write down the lie. Then, go on about your day. Have Dad do the same things, and then talk about the little "contest" you and dad are having ... around the corner ... where she'll be sure to listen in. Whoever writes down the most lies gets an ice cream treat from the other parent.

We did this for awhile. I remember the day I actually gave Marah a big kiss after one of her whopper's, and did a big "YES!" with a fist bump. Slowed down considerably after that. One of us would win, no matter what she did, as long as she kept up the lying.

Shan said...

Ooh good one. :) ^^^^ heh heh

The Waggoners said...

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!
The dumb game was going in full force this afternoon-tried a lot of "I know you are working so hard", she was not liking that..... started to get a bit out of control until a "WOW!.....did you just see that! (with a quick glance out the front door) Look!! Right there!!!!" Of course the crazy fit was turned off and she looked at me like I was nuts, so I simply smiled and said "I am glad that stopped"
Then had to come watch your video AGAIN turned up nice and loud :-)

You are such a blessing-continually thanking God for your willingness to share!!!

marythemom said...

Oh I have a friend who plays Behavior Bingo which sounds like this. She gets really excited when her kids do something dreadful (as in she fist bumps, jumping up and down, thanks them, high fives...). She never shows the kids her (make believe) list or anything, just gets excited. Sometimes she shouts out BINGO! and gives herself a little treat.

Mary in TX

Jessi Hacker said...

I've kinda done that some with her raging, when she is kicking and screaming in the car, I will go thru a drive thru and buy me and icecream and tell her thank you. Will definitely be trying the notepad idea. Shew I'm tired!

familygregg said...

Despite out differences :) I think I mighta maybe found my twin.

Simply Moms said...

our

onceachild said...

Hello Christine,
You don't know me (duh lol) but I wanted to say what an AWESOME site you have! I am really going to be doing a lot of reading here! I found your site thru www.thelittleprince.org on their message board. Jessica posted about it. I am new there... pretty new in fact to this whole attachment disorder stuff!
You see, I don't have children but I DO have a long term history of sexual abuse by a family member, as well as an earlier perp which I've just recently remembered. Also, have some issues around abandonment and loss. I've been in therapy--none of my past therapists even HINTED that I could be suffering from unresolved attachment issues. But my new therapist whom I've been working with online and over the phone, has said she feels that is an issue but she is unable to do that work via phone b/c she said that that type of therapy needs to be done in person. So...we work on what we can for now. She is out of state (I am in Maine.)
ANyway, thanks for all that you do to educate others on these issues. Lori

Wendy said...

Thanks Christine and no I won't be flipping you off anytime soon!!! LOL! I can tell if he is just using 4-year ld curiosity or when he is stuck. he gets this weird look on his face, kind of zen like. Then he asks and asks in a rythmic pattern. He also does the dumb thing. Both 4 year olds do. last week one forgot how to drink form a cup. I praised him for how well he drank all his milk the day before and told him I could see how much he is growing and magically he could drink from his cup again. That was brilliant advice from you in action!

J. said...

thanks so much for taking the time to post these, the reminders are so great and I am loving the pickle ides, we do a lot of the ings you talked about already but we don't have that one in the bag yet, time to add it.

Givans Family said...

The very next day after this post, I gave Joe a bag to talk into....oh boy! You should've seen the look he gave me...then I started singing the Star Spangled Banner....I have never made him so mad at me and not done anything! Apparantly he really didn't enjoy the fact that I was removing his incessent chatter from his chore time! And guess what...he got his three chores done in TWO hours instead of FIVE that day!!!!! So what if someone else could do them in thirty minutes...it was a miracle for him!!!!!! Keep the vlogs comin!

Givans Family said...

The very next day after this post, I gave Joe a bag to talk into....oh boy! You should've seen the look he gave me...then I started singing the Star Spangled Banner....I have never made him so mad at me and not done anything! Apparantly he really didn't enjoy the fact that I was removing his incessent chatter from his chore time! And guess what...he got his three chores done in TWO hours instead of FIVE that day!!!!! So what if someone else could do them in thirty minutes...it was a miracle for him!!!!!! Keep the vlogs comin!

ColorZaz said...

My friend, Cate, suggested this particular episode of your vlog to me and I love her for it. My facebook status had indicated that I was going insane due to this exact thing this morning. I can't wait to try out all your ideas. Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing them!!! Now, I'm heading back out to search for my sanity. It's been missing for a bit. :)

Jenn said...

My daughter nonsense chatters .... TO HERSELF. I've been listening to her talk nonstop, to nobody, for an hour straight now. She's four, but language delayed - no way would a code word or a trick, or counting questions, work for her. She wouldn't "get it." But I will put that trick in my back pocket for future use. Thanks for all you do.